Gameboyz in the Hood
I was never the biggest Gameboy fan. I rather just play my NES. When it first came out it was a technological wonder. Now you have cell phones and the original Gameboy looks like a bulky piece of shit. I have seen tamagotchi pets with more horse power.
The only time I really played Gameboy is on trips or when I’m waiting for something. Like when I’m in the doctor’s office awaiting the results of whether I have hepatitis ZZ or Aids.
I didn’t like the fact that you only see shades of yellow. Like one of those old shitty sepia movies. And the music and sound effects are lame. It kind of sounds like R2D2 on crack.
It was a time when people still used AA batteries. And it drained those batteries. Like when you’re playing Zelda or some other RPG and haven’t saved for an hour and are frantically searching for the save beacon. This happened a lot, like when I was working at Little Caesars and I had to do a delivery right away.
When you think about Gameboy, Tetris immediately comes to mind. I never really enjoyed Tetris. I loathe that repeating music. Nintendo should have got Toto to make the music. Everyone likes Toto.
I found it really, really frustrating and not challenging. For one thing you always need that damn allusive long piece badly. And you only get it when you don’t need it. I think I beat it because you see the rocket launch after you’re done. And I think I made it to level 15. However I admit, playing Tetris against someone else is so much more fun. I love trying to fuck up your friend when you clear several lines at once.
I rather play Dr. Mario because it’s much more fun and easier. For one thing you go through stages. If you never played it before its like Tetris only Dr. Mario throws pills. Like my Laxatives. Your whole objective is to clear the viruses. There are three different colored viruses. The pills have two sides just like any old school pills or my Oxycontins. And they are the same colors as the viruses. So when you get four colors in a row they all disappear.
Again it’s much more fun playing against your friend and trying to fuck them. In my first year of college this girl had Dr. Mario for the NES. I kicked ass but I could never beat her. They called her Jesus. So I bought it for N64 and used to play against my friend. We both love gambling and would bet on Dr. Mario. Very fun. Very nerdy.
It’s heartbreaking when kids have cancer. But I hear child patients actually play Dr. Mario because they are fighting off the viruses in the game just like they are fighting off viruses in their own body.
I love Mario games and have beaten all of them. My favorites are Super Mario 3 and Mario 64. I already written a huge blog dedicated to Mario. But I was disappointed with the Gameboy ones. The enemies were weird and it never felt like a true Mario game. I did finish it and my favorite levels were the scuba ones. But I have no urge to ever play it ever again.
On the other hand Zelda games are always awesome. I loved Link’s Awakening except Gameboy only has four buttons. So you can only carry two weapons at a time and you have to keep switching them. The other two Zelda games for Gameboy color; Oracle of Seasons and Oracle of Ages are fun too.
But they are a little too linear for me. I think Zelda games should have bigger areas to travel to. And I don’t like how you have to complete puzzles and quests in order. That’s my beef with Skyward Sword. I love it but they should more places to explore.
One of the main reasons to own a Gameboy is of course Pokemon! In fact the worth of the Gameboy was much greater when Pokemon first came out then it was like five years before hand.
I put my Gameboy away thinking I’m never going to use it again. So I tried a Pokemon emulator and I was totally impressed. Then I looked through a pile of things and got my dusty Gameboy out. And my yoyo. And my dirty magazines. I bought Pokemon Red. My friend got Pokemon Blue. It came in handy when I broke my leg and my friends stopped hanging out with me.
Years later I got a Gameboy Advance. So I finally put my Gameboy to rest. Again. I think my mom uses it as a paper weight or door stopper. I think they should have included two more buttons like a Super Nintendo controller.
I got a lot of rereleased NES and Super NES games like any Mario, Zelda, and Pokemon game. There are other gems out there like Advance Wars, Final Fantasy and Golden Sun.
Years later I got a DS. So I Finally put my Gameboy Advance to rest. And I have a zillion games. I spent a fortune on them. They came in handy when I’m in Florida or when the power goes out. Sometimes I prefer old school RPGs, strategy games and thinking games over action and shooter games.
Years later I want a 3DS. I don’t know if the 3D effects are cool or get annoying after a while. Is it worth buying Zelda: Orcina of Time to see the 3D effects and play where ever you want? I might wait till my birthday to get a 3DS when they are cheaper and there are more games available. I do want to try the new Mario game or any RPGs I haven’t tried.
I waiting the challenge for any pokemon master to fight me. Anytime, any place.
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