So the Winter Olympics is well underway. Obviously the colder and wealthier nations will win more medals. That means Canada
The opening ceremony was really cool. Again it must have cost millions. It’s kind of funny; you see like a hundred Americans wearing these expensive Nike uniforms. And then you have two athletes wearing track pants from a country I never heard of.
But I’m not the biggest Winter Olympics fan. I find the Summer Olympics way cooler to watch. They have more events and sports for a wider audience. As you know the Olympics began in Ancient Greece. They had events that made sense such as the fastest person. Too bad they had naked wrestling.
It reminds me of Canadian sprinter Ben Johnson. He won the gold in 100 meter dash and broke the record in the 87 Olympics. Then his urine tested positive for steroids and he lost his records. That’s why they should have the Steroid Olympics where you can use as much drugs you want. That way the winner of the sprint is the fasted guy on Earth; on dope.
What I don’t get is do they strip him of his medal and then give it to the second place winner? And then does he gives his silver to the next guy and then the forth guy gets the bronze? I wonder if the medals are actually gold, silver and bronze?
I find there are two kinds of events. There are the fun ones, such as curling and snow boarding. I love watching the half pipe where these guys execute sweet moves. I found snowboarders were disappointed not to place. But losing is not going to eat at them the rest of their life.
Then there are the figure skaters. Figure skating is a fan favorite. My mom loves watching them. I feel really bad for these athletes that lose. Do you know how much pressure is riding on them? They spent the best years of their lives training everyday and then they fall doing a quintuplet axel. Their dreams are crushed and now all the can do is skate in Disney on Ice as Jasmine or shoot themselves.
It reminds me of Tonya Harding. She became a huge whiner. For example she once delayed her performance, said her skate lace was untied and actually asked to do her jump over again. Then she hired some goon to hit her rival Nancy Kerrigan in the leg. And she still lost. What a bitch.
As for curling I bet they enjoy playing. And they don’t really care as much as a figure skater would if they lose. They don’t have to train really. Maybe they practice sweeping the floor with a swifter or play shuffle board.
It reminds me of a really awful Canadian movie “Men with Brooms” I don’t know why Leslie Nielsen is in it. Maybe his career was over and he needed some cash. I guess the funny parts are when they guy slips on ice and Nielsen is on shrooms. The second part of the movie became a shitty chick flick. It should have never been made.
I mean does winning the gold mean that much? I understand Russians and Chinese are pressured to win for glory for the Motherland. But what do you do with a gold medal anyway? Do you wear it around your neck everywhere you go? Or do you put it on the mantel above the fire place and show everyone the bronze medal you won the skeleton? “You see that, I’m the third fastest person on the skeleton.” “Whats the skeleton?”
I don’t know why there is bobsledding, luge and skeleton. It looks fucking dangerous. I remember years ago some guy lost control and wiped out and died. They even replay the video over and over again. That disgusts me. I don’t think man was meant to slide down a track as fast as he can. Besides going to the water park.
It reminds me of Cool Runnings where John Candy teaches some Jamaican runners to bobsled. But wait. Jamaicans bobsled? There isn’t ice in Jamaican. I haven’t seen it in years. I enjoyed it then, but now if I do watch it; I’m sure it’s stupid. I don’t even remember if they smoked any weed or what?
The biathlon is a funny event. I love how you combine shooting a rifle with skiing down a mountain? It sounds like a James Bond movie. You never see someone climb Mount Everest with an AK47. You might as well combine speed skating with mines or other events with weapons.
I was watching some speed skating where one woman slipped and took out two other skaters. I realize you can’t just redo the race but that’s not fair. It not their fault that someone wiped out and tripped them. How about the skaters that collided could do another race and then match their times?
The only event I will watch is the hockey, eh. It’s too bad that Stamkos was taken out; we could really use him. What I don’t get, is does every player get their own medal? And I wonder how much you can get it at black market.
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