Yabba dabba do! Remember the Flint
All of their names sound prehistoric or somehow relate to stones. Fred the main characters is married to Wilma and have a daughter is Pebbles. Their friends are Barney and Bettie and adopted Bamm Bamm, who is in desperate need for some Ritalin.
Fred is going to have a heart attack any time now. He works at the quarry and he’s always in a grumpy mood and overweight. His boss Mr. Slate is a dick. He sees the doctor who tells Fred that he has high cholesterol and asks what you are eating? Well we like dino ribs, giant hogs, Stegosaurus eggs and ten boxes of Kraft macaroni.
I wonder how Fred could get such hotty because Wilma is one fine bitch. Did he go to one dating service or did he just club her. Hey Wilma I’m not wearing any pants or even underwear. Let’s get freaky. Okay dinosaur lights off.
I don’t recall Wilma being pregnant but she must have given birth to Pebbles. I wonder if they looked at a baby names book. Well we have Amy, Shale, Blossom, Marble, and Bertha and oh Pebbles. Pebbles Flintstone what a perfect name.
I think Bettie should teach their adopted son Bamm Bamm to talk. All he says is bam bam and breaks shit. Hey Bettie learn to how to discipline your son. Take away his club or smack him in the ass with a wooden spoon. It worked for me.
Dino is the pet dinosaur that acts as a dog. He must eat four tons of pedigree for dinosaurs. And he must shit a ton. Imagine walking down the road and he has to go take a dump. That would be one hell of a mess and I don’t thing a plastic bag would suffice.
I don’t think the pet saber tooth tiger is a good idea. What are they Siegfried and Roy? The tiger could snap anytime and eat poor little Timmy. Once again they would need one hell of a kitty litter and tons of catnip.
I noticed that the cavemen don’t wearing any socks or pants. I wonder what happens when Fred sits down and you see his hairy junk. I mean he’s wearing a tie but with no pants for Christ’s sake. I guess he must use stone tablets to wipe his ass.
So they have cars but they have to use their feet, which kind of defeats the whole purpose. They don’t even wear shoes and I don’t understand how the auto can turn? What happens if a prehistoric squirrel darts across the street? They would all have to break all at the same time or go in reverse all at the same time. I wonder how well the cars are on gas? Luckily the wheels are made of rock and you shouldn’t have to worry about getting a flat tire. And I don’t recall any trains.
I’m sure they use pterodactyls as air planes. This is the pilot speaking on the pterodactyl express, please be seated while the dinosaur begins takeoff. And please don’t use electronics because it could fuck with the pterarodactly’s small brain. We will be serving fruity pebbles.
You never really see a velociraptor eating people. I don’t know if they have dinosaur guns or spears or whatever to protect themselves.
Did you know that a cigarette company named Winston cigarettes sponsored the Flintstones? Fred and Barney are actually seen smoking them while their wives did housework. Look it up on Youtube it’s hilarious. It’s like the cartoon Joe Camel and not very appropriate for a children’s cartoon.
Now the early 60s seem kind of not modern. You don’t see any rock laptops or rock cell phones. I think they would use an actual mouse and just a block as the screen. I don’t know if the have micro waves or even basketballs.
I use to love Flintstone vitamins and also Flintstone ecstasy. They’re chewable and I won’t get the pill longed in my throat. My favorite is the car. It’s just that for grown man I need a handful of Flintstones pills or three Centrum. Why three? Well if one is good for you than logically three will be three times as good.
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