Freshman Year

College is awesome, but it can be a waste of money. My freshman year was the best year of my life. My dad graduated in engineering at University of Western Ontario and well he became an engineer. Since he was an alumni and donated some money I got in even with my shitty grades. So yeah it is definitely a party university for rich kids.

UWO is located in the heart of London Ontario, Canada. It’s a very beautiful campus. The main center has everything you need such as food court, gym, two bars and movie theater. The library is fucking huge and has every written book in the world. I’m sure Goosebumps fans will go crazy. Windsor University on the other hand sucks ass and has those rape phones every damn 100 meters.

When I talked to my high school councilor I told him I want to have a job in making video games. The closest UWO had to offer was this program MIT. But don’t get mixed up with the real MIT.  UWO’s MIT stands for Media Information Technoculture; whatever the Hell that means. But it is completely useless. I talked to a graduate and she loved it, but is now working at a golf course.

The best part of the MIT program was that a brand new dorm Essex was built and had an exclusive MIT hallway. Essex was awesome, it’s a coed dorm! We each have our own room, shared a bathroom and a common room with four students. And yes we have cable! Honesty I would go insane not having my own room or T.V. Seriously I could never share my room and would probably end up killing my roommate with a crow bar. And I mean what are you going to do without television? Read a book? Haha.

My dad bought me a meal plan that you buy food with your student card. It works at every cafeteria, Subway and Dominos. This is awesome because I love food. Right off the bat I told my roommates that I’m going to order pizza all of the time with my card. If I run out its not like my dad is going to cut me off and make me hunt raccoons or something.

We had a kitchen but also a cafeteria that was opened during the day. The problem was that we each took turns cleaning the dishes. But all I would ever eat was Kraft and drank coffee. I could care less if my dishes were not spotless. I hated doing them because my roommates ate a lot because they were fat or they would reek because one roommate was brown and made some nasty stuff.

But my roommates were really cool, in fact my whole hallway hung out with each other. And since we all were taking MIT we attended the same classes and helped each other out. Our room was the party room where we all chilled. We had two televisions; one for cable and one for video games. We watched a lot of movies and we played a shitload of video games like GTA, Dr. Mario and Mario Tennis.

As I mentioned, UWO is a party school and I like to party. I never drank so much beer or smoked so much weed in my entire life. Along

Richmond Street

is where where all of the action is. Bar hopping with chicks was awesome but I hate dancing. Honestly why do girls like dancing so much? I have no fucking clue what to do or how to move around for an hour. So my roommate told me he loves dancing and I said ya because we like chicks. You never hear a guy say no chicks tonight I just want to dance.

Getting drunk in London is awesome. We used dial a beer a lot, where you pay some dude to pick up alcohol for you. I remember so many walks to Subway completely smashed. Sometimes I could barely order a roasted chicken sub. I would take a good minute in choosing what kind of bread.

Funny my buddy told me he went to Subway and left his credit card. Well douche bag must have seen his password and ended up withdrawing a $1000. I’m not sure if he got it back or what. I would just get my dad to yell at them or else.

UWO students get a bus pass so you get rides anywhere for free. Not having a bike or being lazy I would keep transferring buses. The only downside is that some are totally packed during rush hour and I end up being squished. I need my space! I had a couple of incidents of dropping stuff. I actually spilled my change all over the bus and ended up trying to pick it all up. I didn’t bother with the pennies. I also let go my beer cans and groceries on the bus too.

Part of my problem with high school was that I hated getting up earlier and was always so tired at class. I spent many mornings with me head in my arms. So I was trilled to find out all of my classes were no earlier than noon. Finally I could wake up, have a hot shower, eat some breakfast, drink some coffee and not be in a rush to get on the bus. So I became a night person and became hooked on coffee.

I love music and ended up downloading a shitload. We had a sharing program much like Napster but only for the campus. You could download a song in seconds. I had every single hit from the 70s and up. Too bad I got a virus and lost it all. Damn you porn! So now I burnt all of my mps on blank CDs and also backed them up with external hard drive. Too bad I can’t find any Tina Turner songs anymore.

We only had two washers and dryers per floor and it was a bitch. Normally at home I just put my dirty clothes in this basket and they magically get cleaned. I would end of doing them like four in the morning. But some people suck and just throw it on the ground even though I use a basket. And without my mom’s expertise in cleaning tough stains I could never get the mustard out of my white shirt.

First year classes were a joke. I decided to try out a couple of courses in addition to MIT courses. I passed them all except I dropped out of computer programming after two weeks. I had to take a couple of MIT courses and they were fun and interesting. Our one teacher was weird and made us read this dark Batman book. I ended up doing an essay on Ewok culture.

What bothers me is how the professors make a fortune by keep making us buy the latest edition text book. These are hundreds of dollars. This is so stupid because they might just revise or add a couple of things. So try to sell your text book right away because you will never use it again.

Philosophy was my favorite course, this is where I shine. My TA loved my essays because they stood out. I made them all up without any references to philosophers in the book. He liked my appearance versus reality essay where I wrote about the Matrix. Too bad I lost all of my essays when my computer crashed. However I did write an earlier blog about free will and determinism.

I love movies and thought Film would be an easy bird course. It wasn’t because of all of the damn essays. Some of the movies were cool; I loved Memento and Run Lola Run. But some of them were still in black and white and sucked ass. I think the only exception was Singing in the Rain and Citizen Kane. And our professor was really gay and made us watch gay flicks like Legally Blond.

I love psychology and got great marks. I read the text book once and memorized the chapter summaries and bam I got 85%. I liked it so much that I switched majors and pursued the psychology program for my next two years. However after two and half years I dropped out of college and my dream of becoming a psychiatrist and making a lot of money is over. Now with all of my free time I’m going to write a best seller novel called Blind Faith.