An Epic Journey

So my mom went downtown with her friends. Her car is at the garage for whatever reason. I don’t know nothing about no car. So I was alone and I got really stoned. Again. I thought carpe diem, seize the day! Its so nice outside I went for an epic journey to downtown.

I cut through the cemetery and it was very trippy. I got thinking about my own mortality. I think everyone has a soul. Even Donald Trump. And I don’t mean soul music. There is the body, the mind and the soul. The body is the physical person. The mind is like consciousness of the brain and the soul is like the inner person. So if someone had a stroke or lobotomy they are literally not the same person. Their mind is functioning differently. However there still is that inner person somewhere in there. In other words the soul. I have many theories about the afterlife if there is one. In fact I would like to write my own book Blind Faith.

One silly one is my spirit heaven.  I think God as this giant wisp if you will. A giant shiny ball of electricity. And we are tiny spirit wisps full of life and love and happy to serve him.  He asks these spirits to become humans. Us. And so they fill an empty human pod if you will.  So there is a Justin Beaver pod and a Greg Merchant pod.  So one spirit will jump at the chance to become Beaver, while my spirit will take one for the team and become me the person. And once their done they go back to heaven and have some cake. Ready to do it all over again.

I finally made it down town, but I had to battle some orcs along the way. I ran into my mom and her friends.  I like to do the whole trying to steal her purse gag. I did a lot of looking around and had an epic Big Mac. I ate like a king! The mall was dead as Bea Arthur. I  reached the library, and rented some epic DVDs. They’re free, yay. Too bad they didn’t have the Ten Commandments. I got Erin Brokovich and some embarrassing ones. I actually had to buy a chocolate bar to get a bag for my DVDs from the Kwiki Mart. And it was so windy I almost fell down and let go of my movies. I returned home but my fucking foot is still bothering me. I’m accepting donations.