Wrestling

I like the Olympics but I feel sorry for the athletes. I mean they train their asses off six days a week for several years. For what! A gold medal? A medal saying that they are the best? I feel sorry for even the silver and the bronze medal winners. You’re almost the best. But you lost. What do you do with the medal anyway? Do you hang it up on the mantle or wear it around your neck when you go out? Does it make you feel happy? Does it say I love you? Or does it impress the ladies (or men)? Then there is the silver medalist I’m the second best at long distance running. I’ve spent the best years of my life rigulsouly training like crazy for a silver medal. Is it even made of gold or sliver? Fourth place is even worse. You have accomplished nothing and nobody will remember you.

I was a wrestler in high school. Aside from jockeys, wrestling is a sport where the small and skinny athletes are the best. My brother recommended it because his friend was also a wrestler. So I was 85bls and joined. That’s the lightest weight category for wrestling. But for my size I was tough. The cool part is of course is that you are wrestling other skinny guys and are on an even playing field.

The problem was that I tried too hard to win a useless medal. I was naturally skinny my whole life and ate pretty whatever and how much I wanted. But I got it in my head that I had to keep my weight down. So I started eating less and became somewhat anorexic. And it sucked balls. All I wanted to do was drink pop and eat Big Macs. And for what a cheap medal and pride. I should have had my priorities in check.

If you don’t know, wrestling or grappling is on a mat that you have to stay on. You get points for executing moves or win by pinning the opponent. It lasts for three minutes and whoever is in the lead wins. You have weighins and so we try to lose as much water weight as possible. We wore garbage bags inside our clothes and would run or do steps.

Wrestling is very challenging. It’s not like other sports like soccer or basketball. It’s all up to you. The match lasts about three minutes but wow is it strenuous, you have no idea how tired you get. So I did pretty well but was in the same category as my brother’s friend. Who is the ultimate wrestler and I could never win against him. I basically used two moves, the whole grabbing the leg and tripping him or what I call the all out eagle shoot. The training was strenuous too. We practiced moves. One I like was doing summersaults. It doesn’t really accomplish anything but it’s fun anyway. I use to be able to do sixty pushups. Now I can barely do twenty. Hmm, I am getting old.

I’ll admit it is a little gay. I mean you’re wearing spandexes and grabbing another dude. They actually wrestled naked in ancient Greece. What’s worse is that if there are not enough wrestlers you may have to take on chicks. You can’t win. Either you win and everybody says wow you beat a chick; you’re a real man. Or haha I can’t believe you lost to a girl.