Harry Pothead

My dad has all of the Harry Pothead movies but I haven’t got around to watching them all. I did watch the final one with my dad and brother at the theatre. I loved it. I also started reading the first novel the Sorcerers Stone but I got bored.

It was of course written by Rawlings. I have heard she was so poor that she resorted to writing the stories on napkins in a coffee shop. I also heard that Harry Pothead begun as a bed time story that she would tell to her children. Now she’s rich and famous and can use a super computer and use napkins for wiping her mouth after eating some caviar. I wonder if she will write any more books as successful as Harry Pothead.

Wow did they grow up fast. Emma Watson is now 21, and is fair game now in my books. I wonder what will become of the cast. Do you think the actor behind Harry will become type cast? I mean he could star in a serious drama and the audience thinks he’s going cast a spell or turn someone into a frog.

I think I’d be a horrible wizard because I’d say the spell wrong. One of the problems is that I sort of mumble a lot. In my head I sound like a coy James Bond but when I hear myself on tape I sound like a stuttering cartoon character. It’s a combination of things; I talk too fast and don’t leave a pause between words. And mispronounce long or complicated words. I also have a slight accent because I watch television more than I talk to people. For example I was talking to some chick in school about terrorists and I said I’m surprised they haven’t blown up buses yet. She thought I was saying bosses and after the third time I said you know b u s e s as in school bus. And she’s like oh right. Now I know what you’re thinking, Stickley or whoever, don’t bother making any comments because I will erase them anyway.

So if I was a wizard I would probably not pronounce the spell right and turn someone into a stapler. It would be cool though to have all of these spells.  I would probably end up fat and lazy because I would say Bigmacuritha every time I want a Big Mac. It could get dangerous too. You might want to want to water the flowers but instead cause a level four tsunami. It would be boring reading the whole spell books. I’d read the Coles notes and get right to the interesting spells. Like the one that turns rocks into gold or the one that makes hot girls like you and do two chicks at the same time.

I find it hilarious when all of these stupid religious nuts complain about Harry Pothead. They actually had to change the first title to the Philosophers Stone because of this. Hey idiots it’s fantasy. Wizards or witches are not real, nor does the book promote paganism. And if they are real I wouldn’t be afraid of their spells. Because nothing would happen. When you complain over a fictitious children’s novel that might go against your religion’s teachings you sound stupid.

It’s almost like the Salem witch trails, these Christians probably do believe in witch craft. It’s an actually legitimate religion that is a stupid as Scientology. But seriously the people who practice witchcraft are probably dorks that go out to the woods and pray to the dark lord Satan. Some fundamentalist have gone as far as burning the books. Ha jokes on you, you bought her books and she made money off them. She doesn’t give a shit if you burn some fucking book. Maybe they should recycle the books instead. What’s the worse that could happen if kids read Harry Pothead anyway? Oh my God, little Timmy has read a fairy tale novel and now joined a Satanism cult. Damn you Rawlings, damn you to Hell!