Ronald the Faggy McDonald

My friends always tell me I’m going to have a heart attack any time now. Because all I eat is junk food or candy. My life is just the guy in Super Size Me. If the Donald’s were any closer I’d eat even more. Good thing my mom cooks dinner or else all I’d eat are hungry man dinners. You ate more microwave dinners, that’s only when I'm out do you realize how much sodium there is in them. Funny when I was on my own in London my whole freezer was packed full microwave dinners, especially hot pockets because they were on sale. My excessive coffee and energy drinks also don’t help my health either

Anyway my favorite fast food place; the king of burgers: Mc Donald’s. What’s the deal with calling every thing Mc? It’s just like Batman. Chicken Mc Nuggets, Big Mac, Egg Mc Muffin, Mc Flurry and Mcicecream. Can I have some Chicken Nuggets? Do you mean Chicken Mc Nuggets? Yes.  They finally took down the sing over 99 billion served.  What’s the point of that? Since that many have eaten there it must be good. How did they calculate how many people were served in the earlier years. Hey our Sarnia branch had 51 people served. We got 86 over here.

You don’t see many fast food commercials anymore. I think tampons took over. Which is the most disgusting thing ever. I used to love Mc Donald’s commercials. I love Grimace. I don’t even know what he is exactly he is? Just some big purple blob. The Hamburgular is my favorite, always trying to arm robber Mc Donald’s and executes a Fry Kid every 20 minutes until they give him the damn burgers. Birdie the Bird, good name, is the huge dyke. And you have Officer Big Mac with his partner Lieutenant Cheese Burger. They usually do sting operations to catch the Hamburgular and send him to Mc Prison. And those smiling nuggets scare me. Every time I eat one I feel like they have eyes and a mouth and I’m eating them alive.