Inspector Retard

Inspector Gadget was the complete dufus of a cop. Every episode was the same. All he does is fumble around and accidentally catches those too dofus henchmen. Who get out on bail each time. Penny is the one that actually solves the crimes. I think the dog Brain is more useful. I bet Brain can even use the toilet. And then Dr. Claw escapes in his airplane and yells I’ll get you next time Gadget!

Why does Chief Quimby hide in crash cans and always give him packages that are going to explode? You think both of them would learn by now. For fuck sakes Inspector stop throwing the explosive letter back at me. I already have third degree burns all over my chest and I lost my right thumb. Well Sarg stop giving me explosive letters. Touché. How important are these documents? You know it’s going to leak anyway. I think the Sarg should just save everyone’s time and just give it directly to Penny. And Gadget can be given an alone assignment to go track down some Columbian drug cartel.

How did Gadget come to get his gadgets? He’s too stupid to have created his own abilities. He can’t even tie his own shoes with out a plunger coming out of his arm. Did he have all of these gadgets when his was a kid? I think it’s the same way Wolverine got his powers. I bet they took out half his brain to make room for a clock radio.

Every time he needs something important he gets something entirely different. For example he’s gets thrown off a plane and needs his gadget helicopter thing that pops out of his head so doesn’t fall to his death. He goes go-go gadget helicopter and instead an anvil pops out his head. Wowsers, I going to fucking die!

Or there is a bomb and it’s up to Gadget to diffuse it. Okay, (very quietly) go-go gadget pliers. And then a blow torch comes out his finger and everyone dies of a horrible death. Wowsers!

What’s the point of the van that turns into a police car? Does he have to pick up Penny and her soccer teammates? And then give out speeding tickets. Or does he stake out in the van and then turn it into the cop car once he’s ready to apprehend the criminals in the act. Go-go gadget binoculars and his go-go gadget sirens turn on.

You never do see Dr.Claw. All you see is his hand and his ugly cat  Mittens. It would be so easy to kill him. I mean he can barely stay alive as it is. Tell him to say go-go gadget suicide time bomb. And he’s dangerous for other people around him. Like when he carves the Thanksgiving turkey. Go-go gadget carving knife. No not go-go gadget poisons gas.

He’s Penny’s father, so he must have gotten laid. How did he make sweet love? Okay honey go-go gadget boner. And then a hammer comes out of his package.

And then you have the whole learning is half the battle scene at the end. I’m inspector gadget and you shouldn’t piss on electric fences. I can do it because I’m complete retard cyborg freak.